RDH: SEPTEMBER 2023

05/09/23

06/09/23

Crow in flight. Morrigán. Could see the stabbed brush marks of the wings when watching it in flight. Weird. Aren’t we all?

Time needs to be set aside for practice. Shia LaBeouf.

Sounds like an excuse but a certain letter has thrown a real spanner in the works.

NB: Forgot to jot down that ‘Red Lines’ has been accepted into this years’ Royale Arcade Academy show at Arcade Studios.

07/09/23

LATE NIGHT ART - Belfast

'Living but a Day' - Chloe Austin at PS2

Emma Brennan's work in 'STOOP' group show at DAS.

Some very late-night sketching.

09/09/23

Setting your stall.

10/09/23

Art Wank Podcast with Array - listening during studio time.

“Painting is a place to hide thoughts, hide feelings, hide emotions.”

- Stephen Millar

The Arts are not singular. Arts as a united force for good. Collaboration.

You can’t eat prestige (or a flag).

‘Ready to Go’ blocked out. Not sure if it’s a damp squib but I think it’s worth another shot.

‘Marina’ - content with background. Loose is good. So bloody close.

13/09/23

H.B.S.

After a bit of mulling - the ‘Ready to Go’ canvas is anything but. I have forgotten the first rule:

IF IT DOESN’T EXCITE YOU THEN THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG

It is not and it is also an image that, if it’s going to work, will need another image merged to elevate it.

It is a solid image, and it has a resonance with me personally but it’s just not doing it for me, for the want of a better phrase.

Handed in ‘Red Lines’ to Arcade. Stopped by the MAC to see ‘No History in a Room filled with People wih Funny Names 5’ by Korakrit Arunanondchai and Alex Gvojic with Tosh Basco. An extremely immersive experience.

Abhartach - the Irish Vampire.

Black / Peaty Soil. Roots become negative space. Possible triptych?

14/09/23

Abhartach - source material…

This will be for down the line. Even the little portrait alongside ‘Ready to Go’ on acetate has more promise and, more importantly, has my head spinning!

Back of the bus, it’s been a long time.

Can see where… might have an advantage. More time. Been reading “The World New Made - Figurative Painting in the 20th Century” by Timothy Hyman.

“I was alone in my studio in front of my oil lamp. Two or three in the morning… Dawn is breaking… I used to sit up like that all night long. My lamp burned, and I with it.”

- Marc Chagall c.1920

Henri Rousseau = recovered a primal truth in painting.

17/09/23

Short Sunday Sessions.

“Marina” finished! But only just. A little over indulgent with the fixative meant some emergency fixing (irony) was needed.

If I had my wits about me I should’ve drawn up a new canvas in the 45 minutes spare. Hindsight.

“Look to Henri Rousseau as examplar for a renewal of figural language reborn in the image of childhood.”

- Timothy Hyman

18/09/23

20 week scan. All well! Surreal.

Also, on the way to Causeway - a lovely note, Warm, fuzzy feeling.

21/09/23

Chloe Austin’s “Living But A Day” in PS2

22/09/23

Breaking the Cultural Code - Tenth Anniversary of Derry’s UK City of Culture.

“Culture is everyday lived experience.”

- Sir Phil Redmond

Culture Night Derry

Banu Cennetoğlu at VOID Gallery, Derry

24/09/23

Studio time. There was a temptation to rework ‘Ready to Go’ for a minute. Had to remind myself that structurally it’s interesting but it doesn’t excite me to see where it can go.

“A Brush with… Claudette Johnson”

A really promising start to three canvases today.

25/09/23 & 26/09/23

BP high. Ordered to Antrim A&E. Arrived at 7pm - didn’t get seen until 10am on Tuesday. Tests to be done and rest needed. Poor timing.

28/09/23

…day in court.

29/09/23

VAI Get Together 2023 - Online day.

Imogen Stidworthy - How We Work.

Lindsey Mendick talk was great!

30/09/23

Be better at channeling time and effort into productive means.

We’re all a work in progress.

RDH: NOVEMBER 2022

05/11/22

Art and Ecology Podcast.

Studio Time with an assistant!

08/11/22

Painting in RUA has SOLD!

11/11/22

It all adds up.

12/11/22

“You know in the back of your own mind if criticism holds any merit for yourself.”

13/11/22

Studio time - short but sweet stint today. Good progress on three pieces. A little too on the nose in some areas but very productive otherwise.

17/11/22

VAI Get Together day 2. Highlight was listening to Samir Mahmood talk about his practice.

19/11/22

Progress on “Feeling Stretched” and “Red Lines”. Getting there. Colour choices needing a tweak though.

20/11/22

Belfast trip with the family. Ulster Museum - Renaissance to Romanticism. Brueghel the Younger pieces very good and the Goya portrait on display is a special painting.

Great to get up with Jan and Imogen to see the RUA again.

26/11/22

Shocked and saddened to hear of Hugh O’Donnell’s passing. I got to know Hugh in applying for funding in 2018 and again in the run up to my solo show in Atypical in 2020.

Hugh was always so kind with his time - having a studio visit beforehand and his feedback and insight during the install was a dream. Hugh was a real presence and his life blessed all who spent time with him. Rest in Piece Hugh.

30/11/22

Priorities shifted about.

RDH: SEPTEMBER 2021

02/09/21

Organised ‘used imagery’ away into respective folders.

04/09/21

Acetate transfers onto canvas.

05/09/21

King Farouk onto pyramids? … GREEN LIGHT!

Quitting while ahead today but so far so good.

06/09/21

Scanning.

07/09/21

Such a mover! Beyond happy and proud and excited for things to come.

08/09/21

Some good groundwork done on the two smaller pieces.

09/09/21

Sketchbook work.

11/09/21

Tidy and apply sort of a day.

12/09/21

“Painting as an act of assembling different references.” - Ralph Rugoff

Finished “Saint and Sinner”.

13/09/21

Excited for VAI Get Together ‘21.

14/09/21

A long night of scans, and resizing drawing works.

15/09/21

Layers and layers, back and forth. Named due to facial expression.

18/09/21

Long shift in the studio but finished “Unimpressed”. Front hand is rough but if there was more done, it could ruin the whole piece.

22/09/21

… relished in the relationship between the paint mark and the drawn line - their harmonious and, at times, antagonistic tendencies.

Good bit of progress to “Rex Aegypti Penultimus”.

Applied and a waiting on.

25/09/21

<— This will be tough!

A nice couple of hours in the studio today. Pushing and pulling on “R.A.P.”.

26/09/21

Really good live chat with Clinton Kirkpatrick on Instagram. Nervous but thought it went alright.

28/09/21

Sketchbook work.

Huge congratulations to Array Collective for opening their Turner Prize exhibition. Everything is crossed!

30/09/21

Wake me up…

Surviving or THRIVING? - Panel Two Podcast!

On Thursday 18th March, I took part in a panel exchange regarding support and wellbeing in the visual art sector in Ireland. This was the second panel talk of which there will be a total of six - each one focussing on different areas of the creative sector in Ireland. Host by Dr Maureen Gaffney the other artists on the panel were Miriam O’Connor and Austin Ivers. Click below to listen to the podcast!

Surviving or Thriving? was created by the Waterford Healing Arts Trust with the Arts Council of Ireland and I would like to thank them for inviting me to speak and to Visual Artists Ireland for providing support for this panel.

It was great to get to know Miriam and Austin in the lead up and wonderful to hear their thoughts on being an artist during what’s been a rough twelve months.

The other Surviving or Thriving? events run up until the 1st April 2020 and more information about upcoming talks and workshops can be found here.

Surviving or THRIVING? - Supporting the wellbeing in the Arts Sector

I’m delighted to be taking part in one of the panel talks revolving around the wellbeing of the Art Sector in Ireland. Devised by the Waterford Healing Arts Trust (WHAT) in partnership with the Arts Council of Ireland and support from other organisations such as Visual Artists Ireland, Age and Opportunity, and Dance Limerick to name a few, this series aims to inspire and support the viewers, panellists and listeners while also acknowledging the difficulties for the arts at the moment. Each event will be available in podcast form at a later stage.

The panel I will be involved in will focus on the visual arts alongside Miriam O’Connor, Austin Ivers and chaired by Dr. Maureen Gaffney. If visual art isn’t your thing, other corners of the arts in Ireland has been accommodated - from literature to dance, music, theatre and collaborative arts. These free events run from the 15th March to 1st April every weekday at 10.30am (the final Theatre workshop on the 1st Aprll begins at the different time of 12.30pm).

To book your FREE ticket for ‘Panel Exchange 2: Visual Art’ click here.

For a list of all talks/workshops in the Surviving or THRIVING? series click here.

RDH: JUNE 2020

01/06/20

Clarify your eye.

Mixed what was left on the palette after 7 weeks of caking. It produced this gorgeous black / green hue perfect for the large canvas. Dad gave me a hand to clean it as I only have one at the minute.

02/06/20

In two minds but some good ground work. VAI café now with Alan Phelan and Ursula Burke.

UB: Being a witness to what has been happening.

UB: Bridging the gap between antiquity and the contemporary.

AP: John Joly Photography method

03/06/20

Hospital appointment: I can take the wrist support off!

Painting again. Very very rusty but such a nice feeling to be standing in the studio again.

Detail of fracture

…there are areas that work really well (the transparency of the plates in the skull). Painterly approach. Pretty much the rest is just clunky and stale.

04/06/20

The following quotes are from ‘Theories of Modern Art: A Source Book by Artists and Critics’ by Herschel B. Chipp:

“The source of all inspirations. Whether the artist works directly from nature from memory, or from fantasy, nature is always the source of his creative impulses.”

Hans Hofman - on the topic of nature.

“…a synthesis from the artist’s standpoint of matter, space and colour. Creation is not a reproduction of observed fact”

Hans Hofmann - on the topic of creation.

05/06/20

Mucked up.

06/06/20

Built up layers on two smaller pieces. They are at that stage when there is something missing - limbo.

‘Circular Lapse’ was in that place until the overlapping discs were added. Patience.

07/06/20

“Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.”

Salvador Dali

Put the brakes on today.

08/06/20

Detail of ‘Jester’ drawing

New projector at long last. It doesn’t move an inch!

09/06/20

Got to using a brush at the end of a bamboo cane like Matisse used to.

“It was in me like the rhythm that carried me along. I had the surface in my head.”

Henri Matisse - on the use of bamboo tool

Visual and bodily. Some good progress today.

Detail of “Beatrice Study”

10/06/20

Troy Michie Talk Art was very good.

Detail of "Beatrice Study”

Finished “Beatrice Study” but paid the price; head is banging. Am I doing too much too soon?

11/06/20

Well today was a write off. Spent several hours at the Royal in Belfast looking for answers to the pounding head and the potential CSF leakages. Feels like recovery has taken a step back by a few weeks.

13/06/20

Trebuchet magazine has arrived and some updates to website.

15/06/20

Slept in.

Would love to visit the Christo and Jeanne-Claude covering of the Arc de Triomphe in October 2021.

Studio time feels a little panicked for some reason. Settle the head.

Now I.N.A.R.P. but I think there comes a level of pressure when you are personally and emotionally connected to a person to try and capture them as they once were. Settle the head and shake it off!

Well - you do get days of going backwards. Pre-mix before committing?

Cinematic tropes to frame personal trauma - à la Roxanna Halls.

16/06/20

Close up of “Back in my Day”

Really early start. Seems to have worked - finished “Back in my Day”. When in a certain frame of mind I seem to work quickly. Time is something I have in spades at the moment. Have probably over-painted areas (hands) but best leaving it as is and moving on.

17/06/20

Drawing and tonal work to “Race to the Bottom” - working title.

A homemade multi-brush handle.

18/06/20

…any shout of a practical day in the studio has disappeared. May be a blessing in disguise though as it’s probably best that I don’t spend every day standing in the garage through this recovery period.

20/06/20

…in terms of “RttB”, washes are or will probably key to keeping the action / immediacy of the figures alive.

Really pleased with how some of the facial work turned out today and I think the differing tones of navy/blue/grey will work.

22/06/20

2pm start - better than not starting at all I guess. After a few hours of frustration it was decided to just omit the second figure from the left. Eventually made more sense compositionally - balancing out the tumbling ensemble.

Removal of a figure

Need to be careful.

23/06/20

Different perspectives - slightly out of focus.

Am I too picky?

Sketchbook work

Over six hours of really solid drawing time today.

24/06/20

Two canvases primed. Focus vision and work on that one element. It isn’t a race.

25/06/20

Before I literally wipe the slate (palette) clean - could I use those silky black colours on the large canvas? Probably shouldn’t have got up at 5am. Eyes are rolling in head and its only 10:16am…

…waiting on a phone call. It was 47 minutes later than scheduled and on the phone call they decided to reschedule and to expect a phone call next week…

On third wind now but thought it best to call it a day before setting out the stall entirely.

‘A cup of clarity from the clarity flute.’

Eye detail - in progress

26/06/20

Unified the sky of the large canvas with a thick thick covering of velvety black paint. Pushing the oppressive sky downwards closing in on the running figures. Claustrophobic.

Now, learn from previous over meddling mistakes and move on!

Michael Armitage talk from Brooklyn Rail was fantastic! Got to ask a question too!

27/06/20

Studio Shot: 27/06/20

Really need to sort out a decent sleeping pattern.

28/06/20

Charcoal work today and not much else. Notes and revising for a presentation.

29/06/20

Very very close. Addition of the poppy. Centuries ago, the poppy was known as the witch’s flower. This is where the Irish for poppy comes from as ‘cailleach dhearg’ translates to ‘red hag’.

30/06/20

VAI Show and Tell: Northern Ireland addition. Delighted to have taken part.

RDH: MARCH 2020

01/03/20

Focus turns to show opening.

03/03/20

Spend a little time looking and you might find a way in. Now at that limbo stage with “No Remorse”. Compositionally solid but colours and painterly gestures are off.

Surprising bound forward on “Self Portrait with Sketchbook”. Face is mask-like (maybe a good thing?)

05/03/20

Nervous as hell. First stop - Ursula Burke in the Ulster Museum. Wonderful scope and the wall mural is stunning. A quick jaunt into town - in GT’s “Dissolving Histories” I especially liked Stuart Calvin’s work. Great to see Dougal McKenzie’s project space show “More Bad News”. Beautiful little touches.

Ursula Burns in the Ulster Museum

"Dissolving Histories" in the Golden Thread

"Dissolving Histories" in the Golden Thread

"More Bad News" by Dougal McKenzie

"Songs and the Soil" by Mark Garry in the MAC

Next onto the MAC for Mark Garry’s “Songs and the Soil”. Placed over the three galleries, the work is immersive and stunning.

"Confessional" install in Atypical Gallery

Before the doors opened in Atypical

Myself and Dad under "Crown of Dionysus"

Helped with the last little touches to the show prep. Great turnout for Late Night Art and the feedback has knocked me back - in the best possible way. Really not good at taking compliments. Marcus Keeley came by for a chat in the store room for his “Instant Feedback” podcast.

06/03/20

Wee stay with Jane. A beautiful house and a beautiful soul. Finally got to visit QSS for “Four Female Painters” exhibition. Amazing space and great work. Alana Barton’s piece “Blossom” made me cry and not even ashamed to say it. It struck a nerve. The delicacy of the child’s little fingers touching the adult’s hair. Beautifully painted.

"Blossom" by Alana Barton

"Four Female Painters" show in QSS

Took myself back to re-watch Mark Garry’s videos in the MAC. The close up recordings of the horses is haunting and strangely intimate.

08/03/20

Few days off but little updates online here and there.

11/03/20

Sketchbook work

14/03/20

Scary times. Back to the looking phase. It seems to help.

Self Portrait: face is still very mask-like. Reminds me of a still from “Les yeux sans visage”.

…knowing when to quit for the day is important.

15/03/20

Slow burning day but when I eventually got to studio and began making real progress, the power goes off!

Serves me right for getting ahead of myself.

“No Remorse” in progress

16/03/20

The “In Conversation” that was to take place with the show in Atypical has rightly been postponed due to ongoing circumstances.

18/03/20

Have to self-isolate for 14 days. The worries mount.

22/03/20

Sketchbook work for the first time in 11 days. Feels like a lifetime.

Is there a better, more cohesive way to go about the drawing side of practice?

I think immediacy, or the notion of immediacy, is still important.

24/03/20

Transferred some recent drawings to acetate.

STEP UP!

25/03/20

Studio time with Radiohead.

26/03/20

A bit of sketching but mainly organising imagery.

“There’s no point in worryin’ what ye can’t control.”

BAK

“No Remorse” is finished. There are parts that still annoy but all in all pleased to it’s best to leave it and move on.

28/03/20

Pushing and pulling with “Self Portrait with Sketchbook”. Frustrating but really fun at the same time!

29/03/20

Cleaning palette and studio up. Also stripped the background of “SPwS”. Too similar to the skin tones and made the canvas seem quite flat.

30/03/20

So bloody close!

31/03/20

Last day of quarantine.

Great to take part in the VAI online café and to get an insight into Tinka Bechert’s wonderful work.

“SPwS” finished. It is very wonky as it’s taken from a very wonky sketch from a few years ago but there’s something about the sketch that made me want to try and develop it into a painting for quite some time.

RDH: OCTOBER 2019

01/10/19

“A puncture - a level of emotion” - Zarina Bhimji

Mental health does not and should not define who we are.

Work is dropped off to Newtownards!

03/10/19

Umbrella destroyed by storm but the opening of “Bardo” was great. Great support from friends and a wonderful text written by Gemma Murphy.

09/10/19

“Sress is the killer of creativity” - Jamian Juliano Villani

Good sketchbook session tonight.

11/10/19

Doodles to burn.

12/10/19

‘Cooley’ is gone. Very stale so had to go. A really old image of Helen has replaced it. It’s been a long time since I attempted this image.

Mask and orchard idea. Sucker for attempting old failures.

17/10/19

Placed…

The prodigal ipod returns after nearly a year missing.

19/10/19

“Study of Helen” - image is nine years old and I’ve tried to tackle it many many times but only now does it feel like I am making any sort of headway. Difficult to describe. “No Regrets” - push and pull between the two images.

20/10/19

Conscious decision to limit the palette initially. Sometimes there can be too much choice - especially when starting a new piece. Thinking that by limiting colour in the first stages it can help focus in on tonal values and composition a little more.

“No Regrets” - Painting in progress

Weekends aren’t long enough.

24/10/19

Couple kissing under a dark sky.

Geometric lines turn from canvas folds to forks of lightning.

Portrait with slightly opened lips.

26/10/19

Joy Gerrard

Zoë Murdoch

Ciaran Harper

Alana Barton

Cornelia Parker

Very impressed with the RUA show this year. Some really strong works. Also great to check out the Ulster Museum’s new acquisition of Cornelia Parker.

Troy Michie

Elliott Jerome Brown Jr.

‘On Refusal’ in the MAC is brilliant - especially Troy Michie’s stunning collages.

David Sherry’s ‘Philosophical Society’ in the Golden Thread Gallery was a lot of fun!

Some unexpected speed curating from VAI was good fun and great to meet up with old friends.

27/10/19

Little visit to Fiona Stewart’s fabulous studio to be recorded for an upcoming podcast.

30/10/19

Applications.

RDH: 01/11/18 - 30/11/18

02/11/18

… all but done…

03/11/18

Do I need a foreign colour? “Afore the Stoop” went in a slightly different direction than first thought. I think I had that quote by Helen Johnson still ringing in my ears about imagery possessing different surface qualities and being on different registers on the same picture plane.

The buzzard is still; hovering overhead while the still-life is in flux. Melting in on itself. To not just merge separate imagery on the one canvas but to treat them differently via technique. I’ve done this regularly in the past but never to this extent before and definitely not on this scale. There’s loads going on: blocked areas, melting, washes and burning/corroding of the surface for texture.

“Confessional” is a different beast altogether. It’s going to be a slower process - building up washes of colour, drawing elements back in followed by more washes until it comes to an end or a crossroads. So far so good. It’s not really a colliding of images. It’s the notion of what a negative of a pattern could do to another image.

Refreshing to see organisations opening doors. The model is being altered.

04/11/18

Kept hearing the shrieking of a buzzard every time I went to work on “Afore the Stoop”. When I looked it was perched on top of the tallest tree at the end of the lane and then glided off.

06/11/18

Some sketchbook work. Not a lot of time but that’s my fault.

09/11/18

HELP!

10/11/18

For studio work: cautious steps or daring leaps? Annoyingly close to finishing “ATS”.

Submission writing hurts my head.

11/11/18

Films to watch:

‘Deer Hunter’

‘Inland Empire’

‘The Killing of a Sacred Deer’

’Kill List’

‘Enemy’

‘Fruitvale Station’

‘Green Room’

‘Silence’

Finished “ATS”. Still bits that annoy but for the sake of not destroying it entirely, I don’t mind the imperfections.

Help has been indispensable.

12/11/18

Still waiting on magazine.

13/11/18

Egon Shiele Documentary - transcending the idea of the body as beauty.

15/11/18

Nothing.

16/11/18

Belfast bound for curator talks but looking forward to visiting some galleries first.

Jane McCormick’s “Not Half Right” at the University of Atypical was absolutely amazing. Insanely strong drawing and sculptural elements.

Nikolaus Gansterer in the MAC International 2018

Ali Cherri in the MAC International 2018. His work was the stand out work for me.

Curator talks as part of Belfast Open Studios from Visual Artists Ireland offices. Speaking at the event: Nora Hickey from CCI in Paris, Ika Sienkiewicz-Nowacka from CCA Warsaw, Dean Brierley from Caustic Coastel in Manchester and Anna Ciabach - formally of Monopol Gallery in Warsaw.

17/11/18

Work is being used as an example to show other artists about finding your own voice. Chuffed.

…someone has been keeping an eye on my progress and that is something!

Another trip to Belfast for more galleries and then a Speed Curating event.

Gerard Carson’s “Submersible Extractions” in Platform.

Patrick Colhoun at the Golden Thread Gallery.

Still of Barbara Hammer’s work at the Golden Thread Gallery exhibition.

Layout of the ‘Speed Curating’ event by VAI held in Belfast Exposed.

18/11/18

It has been a hectic but brilliant few days. Yesterday I called into Platform to see Gerard Carson’s “Submersible Extractions” and a solo show by Dryden Wilson. I followed this up by a quick look at the Barbara Hammer exhibition and Patrick Colhoun’s project space work in the Golden Thread Gallery. Then it was time for the speed curating event at Belfast Exposed.

… do research. What artists i admire….

…Strange. Nothing negative. Just nothing.

A lot of information. A real painter?

19/11/18

“In Defence of Representation” essay by Tristan Garcia.
In western philosophy the representational object is either a copy, a sign or a duplex.

“… according to the semiotic model, there is no representation without signification, that is to say without interpretation.” - Tristan Garcia

20/11/18

“Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema” - Screen (1973)

“The Victim” - Saul Bellow

21/11/18

Tried sketchbook work - failed miserably.

23/11/18

Projection onto fog screen.

Beaver Moon.

24/11/18

Thunderchild?

Line of connection between viewer and work - GO’H

Ask the question: what do you see?

25/11/18

Yesterday I eventually got painting around lunchtime - back and forth with ‘Confessional’ but progress made.  Great talk with GO’H about ‘the gaze’.

Leaf blowing.

27/11/18

Need to select paintings for Framewerk Christmas show.

28/11/18

“The Trouble with Painting” - ICA (YouTube)

“What you’re interested in in the world will feed back into what you are interested in as an artist.” - Alison Pilkington

…speaking about dreams, a quote from Alison Pilkington’s drawing seminar from the RHA really stuck out.  I’m paraphrasing here but the guts of it is this:  talking to people about why you make the work you do (or about your inspirations for that matter) is like talking to people about your dreams.  People aren’t overly interested when someone else describes a dream.  It’s subjective and personal and it’s all but impossible to get the experience across properly.

Sketchbook work.

29/11/18

A difficult few weeks to come.

VAI Speed Curating: Nov 2018

On Saturday 17th November, Visual Artists Ireland held a Speed Curating event in Belfast Exposed Gallery as part of their Belfast Open Studios 2018 programme. It was great to get a chance to speak to curators both from here and also based further afield: Manchester, Paris, Warsaw and Rome.

For artists, I can’t recommend taking part in events like this highly enough. Thanks to Rob, Chris and Siobhán from VAI and to all the curators for their time and feedback!

Show and Tell: Dún Laoghaire

I was delighted to take part in VAI’s Show and Tell talks held at the stunning DLR Lexicon building in Dún Laoghaire.

I spoke about my practice and working methods along with other artists who gave insights to their work.

Speakers:

Eileen Malaniff, Des Kenny, Sheena Meagher, Melissa Ellis, Sarah Boyle, Jane Murtagh, Cecilia Bullo and Katherine Halford Greene.

Many thanks to Siobhán Mooney from VAI and DLR County Council for organising the event.

RDH: 01/07/18 - 31/07/18

01/07/18

Crunching numbers.

02/07/18

... feels unfinished ... sections fall apart ... a denying of illusionism ...

"The Mountain of the Heights" in progress.

03/07/18

TRAUMA PARADOX - CONCEPT

04/07/18

Shocked. Head spirals backwards.  Sketchbook work today.

05/07/18

'Bardo' - (tibetan) a state between life and death

...instead of saying "What's wrong with you?" it should be "What happened to you?"

relaxing with visual artists news sheet from VAI

1:  Emotional brain basically becomes a 'survival brain' and can hijack the conscious brain.

2:  Alarm system in brain becomes distorted and a person may become hyper vigilant.

3:  Ability to appraise the present and to learn from experience (an imbalance and a resistance to heal).

Developmental trauma takes time to heal and there are no quick fixes.

BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH!!!!

07/07/18

Lifting works from the Townhouse Gallery in Belfast.

rough sketch for an installation idea

08/07/18

A research day.

09/07/18

Studio wall

Refined some charcoal marks on the large landscape today.

10/07/18

"Traumatic Memory"

trauma - from the greek meaning 'to wound' or 'to pierce'.

11/07/18

NOTES from Psychology texts:

"...the story of trauma is one of enlightenment and forgetfulness.Knowledge gained and lost over and over. A history categorised by criticism and denial."

A tragic paradox of trauma is that one of it's primary casualties is that of truth itself.

Trauma is considered as - "an event outside the range of usual experience." (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders -III - R - 1980)

Trauma shatters the assumptive world - invincibility has gone and the world is seen as darker, chaotic, evil and dangerous.

12/07/18

Sketchbook work today.  Little steps are better than no steps at all.

13/07/18

Canvas nearly ready to go in the studio

Stretched a few canvases today.

14/07/18

detail of landscape in progress

Colours laid out and tightened back of landscape canvas.

15/07/18

;

16/07/18

"The Mountain of the Heights" in the garden.

Finished "The Mountain of the Heights" today.  Could have done more but I'm learning to let go before work is destroyed.

17/07/18

"Second hand images can create first hand emotion" - Marlene Dumas

18/07/18

A delivery of paints came today

19/07/18

"Lost Illusions" by Balzac

20/07/18

A pretty good start to my week off; I have been offered a solo show!

21/07/18

Justine McDonnell's "A Composition of She" in the Golden Thread Gallery, Belfast

First night out in Belfast in ages and we are evacuated from Laverys due to a 'fire'.

22/07/18

Stunning paintings by Elizabeth Magill at the Ulster Museum, Belfast

23/07/18

An idea for using flattened paint boxes.

Too many ideas floating around.

NB:  To loosen up before working from chosen imagery, I want to try and do some work from life beforehand.  Can't do any harm.

A five minute self portrait study

24/07/18

"The Landis Museum" exhibition at the CCA, Derry

A trip to Derry for meetings and gallery visits.

Detail of one of Colin Davidson's remarkable paintings in "Silent Testimony" at the Nerve Visual Gallery, Derry

I first saw Colin Davidson's 'Silent Testimony' three years ago in the Ulster Museum. Today it was in the Nerve Visual Gallery in Derry.  Still so powerful.  The 'us and them' mentality is nonexistent and removing divisive language and politics reveals the human suffering on all sides.  It is so important.  So glad to have seen it again.

Beginnings of a small canvas experiment

Merging two old drawing works onto a new canvas.

Have multiple little eggs going on at the moment.

Imagine... Rose Wylie on BBC iPlayer

...where presence is evident...

"I think you're a lot happier if you don't mind a bit of imperfection." - Rose Wyllie

25/07/18

The two sons of Oedipus, Polynices and Eteocles translates to "Manifold Strife" and "Truly Glorious" respectively.  Might just be the title of a new painting that's been started.

Good news: I have two works pre-selected for the Royal Ulster Academy 2018.  Fingers crossed!

26/07/18

"What's for you won't go past you."

Progress on a small painting study

TAL R on Louisiana Channel

"It's strange, but you can't make a painting without content. Content is not like solving a problem in school or university. Content much more means that you've built up enough reason to do it. And content is also shitty because if you begin to identify too much with the content then you can't move. There are too many people shouting out in the chorus. Content starts you up and you leave it behind. It doesn't mean that you remove yourself from the content but it's too cumbersome to carry along. So when I'm working, it's not mechanical at all but it's cool headed because I'm not questioning the content. I've left it behind. It's interesting to say that content is crap, but you can't live without it." - TAL R

27/07/18

Four works in progress in the studio

"A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" - painting in progress

Really pleased with how "A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" is shaping up.

"You have to create something that lives in a kind of mystery." - TAL R

28/07/18

Worked on "Rehearsal Study" today.  Played with skin tone and facial features using an air compressor to manipulate the paint. A slightly less controlled appearance.

31/07/18

So pleased to have been able to attend the iDA reception event at the Atypical Gallery in Belfast.  This website is only possible through the iDA grant from atypical and the Arts Council fo Northern Ireland so I'm extremely grateful for their continued support and guidance.  Congratulations to all the award recipients this year!

Whoever heard of a Black Artist?" on BBC iPlayer.