reflective diary

RDH: DECEMBER 2023

03/12/23

Very cold in the studio. Can’t be a put off though.

Séance piece:

Wall and floor = re-adjust

Blue Figure = push back / get rid of

The woman in blue - basically taking away from the overall composition.


… Getting there. Simplified the back wall. Colours are all wrong but at least it’s going in the right direction structurally.

07/12/23

Warhol at the Hugh Lane, Dublin - Excellent

09/12/23

A round of image gathering is in order. Juices.

10/12/23

14/12/23

Isn’t it funny how a conversation can be the spark that begins to slot pieces into place…

Winter months are slow in the studio - always have been - there’s nothing new there.
What is different is the less time being allocated to focus on drawing [rephrase] not making enough time to focus on drawing elements. TIME CAN BE MADE!


”Artists reflect on what is happening”

Rachel Whiteread

SKETCHING

17/12/23

Studio.

Background work on ‘soldier’ piece and a new portrait started over an abandoned canvas.

Drew the charcoal into a fresh layer of white. Will see what comes of it.

18/12/23

Applied.

23/12/23

I do enjoy looking back over the year that’s about to pass. One eye on the past yada yada.

There has been no strict recordkeeping so an idea flashes in and then fades out only to pop in later in a diluted and obscure way where I struggle to recollect the initial instance. Should be rectified. Plenty of ways to keep quick notes.

Joints are aching from the impending dose.

25/12/23

Merry Christmas. Very mindful… so counting blessings and appreciating the little joys.

26/12/23

It’s been a strange one. Anything but restful.

Crow - Chimera - spark/spark/spark.

28/12/23

In the studio and had intended to clean palette ahead of some painting time tomorrow but there’s just too much good paint out to waste. Some looking and notes to aid tomorrow:

Séance in London - notes:

  • It’s a bloody séance - it shouldn’t make sense.

  • Remove shadows

  • Push fireplace back (cooler / lighter)

  • Chairs - are they needed?

  • Omit / darken bottom section.

Again, it doesn’t have to make sense. It’s a nonsensical act. Defying logic so the picture shouldn’t live by those rules.

Soldier Piece - notes:

(layer of white on right figure’s clothes done)

  • Alter skin tones - middle too cold, left too warm. Find a balance. Soldier has seen / committed horrors - bare this in mind.

29/12/23

A good solid day in the studio - and the last one of the year. Loads of coffee.

‘Séance’ - fireplace removed, chairs gone and front three figures blocked in again. Compositionally, it’s definitely a step in the right direction. How does one make an image ominous?

[insert researched answer here] e.g.: 'Fuseli’s ‘The Nightmare’

The little portrait study came about very quickly. A much looser approach so far and some nice elements in the painting. It does run the risk, however, of muddiness so must be mindful.

Last Studio shot of the year.

30/12/23

Asleep after lunch … never thought I would see the day.

…outline of concrete that covers crack in the wall outside. Repurposing shapes you see every day into works.

Five Uneven Steps.

RDH: MARCH 2023

01/03/23

Hunter / Gatherer Mode: Night Two

05/03/23

Studio - a long needed clean-up and great to get going with paints again.

Working on larger-than-life hands - a teacher once told us that if you can draw hands, you can draw anything. This is whirling around in my head today as I tackle these.

08/03/23

…not selected. A little disheartening but onwards and upwards.

12/03/23

Back has hindered any studio time this weekend.

…well Sunday night took a turn for the weird. Trip in ambulance to hospital. Struggled to breathe. Long story short: X-Ray clear, CT Scan clear but blood tests abnormal.

A few days rest needed.

15/03/23

Sketchbook work.

Want to utilise time better.

18/03/23

GRAND SLAM!

19/03/23

Some really substantial progress today on “Boy Soldier”. A balancing act as always.

27/03/23

What a year it’s been! Happy Birthday to our little girl, Imogen.

29/03/23

List of drawings that have ‘slipped’ through the net…

20+ images that have popped out this time around. There’s potential for further progress here. Strange how on another day of sifting through past work a separate set of images could jump out.

The brain is an odd critter.

RDH: OCTOBER 2022

02/10/22

#Mousegate

Strange events

08/10/22

…notes complete. Need refined for easy consumption.

13/10/22

Royal Ulster Academy opening. Craig Donald won an award for best portrait! A great night all round and chuffed to see my little painting up on the wall with some wonderful artists.

14/10/22

Early start. Perhaps the X in X4 stands for extra-long.

Talk in the Hugh Lane couldn’t have gone any better. Pleased with the reaction and feedback from everyone and profoundly grateful to Basic Space for the opportunity to speak.

15/10/22

Studio Shot: 15/10/22

A Brush With… William Kentridge’.

charcoal - the indeterminacy of the point.

… at the edge of meaning.

“Give an image the benefit of the doubt… there is a danger in certainty.”

William Kentridge.

21/10/22

NB: Melancholic apostle image interesting.

22/10/22

World of proximities.

23/10/22

26/10/22

Sketchbook work.

David Lynch “The Art Life” - documentary

27/10/22

The Art Spirit” by Robert Henri

30/10/22

“Cherish your own emotions and never under value them”

Robert Henri

RDH: MARCH 2021

04/03/21

It’s been a full on week - trying to ease myself in slowly and find my footing again and knowing my limits.

Evenings = questions

05/03/21

UPDATES

06/03/21

Handwriting is a microcosm of the personality.

the-infamy-of-crete-WIP.jpg

A good start to “The Infamy of Crete”. Muddy palette so far but for now it’s working.

11/03/21

SorT? tech-check. Target -> 1488 (done).

Bullet points for a smooth six minutes.

Could easily fall into the trap of not doing anything this weekend but I know how it would make me feel if nothing was to happen. Try your best - productive variables.

12/03/21

Good God this text is heavy!

small-works.jpg

Taking time in the studio. The little pieces of canvas / glass that I’ve been asked to put something on for a student’s project was actually a really good loosening / warming up exercise. I have plenty of little strands laying around and could put paint down / play / experiment / make mistakes for twenty minutes before moving onto wall works. Not a bad idea.

Gold Leaf for step edges possibly?

13/03/21

Some really solid background work to “On Gilded Steps” - a lot of blending work. The scratching around the figures - lets try and keep some of that!

15/03/21

Scanning.

16/03/21

Having to go up above to finish online work just sucks.

18/03/21

Waking up at 4am - chocking. Not good.

WHAT Panel talk

Miriam O’Connor: different coping mechanisms - access to the studio so important - adaptability key to productivity - art to navigate trauma in life - art practice is tool for survival

Austin Ivers: teetering between the two poles of anxiety and boredom.

19/03/21

Really enjoyed taking part in the panel talk yesterday and the podcast is out today. So happy it was recorded before my voice left me completely.

Some more work to “On Gilded Steps” today.

Some more work to “On Gilded Steps” today.

20/03/21

Darkness in control.

detail-on-gilded-steps.jpg

O.G.S.” - Steps are really annoying me. In hindsight I probably would have set the steps differently. now, however, with the background nearly prefect as it is, it could be a disaster to try and adjust the steps and lose that backdrop. I have this painting by Rembrandt rolling around in my head at the minute.

“The Conspiracy of the Batavians under Claudius Civilis” - Rembrandt - 1661/1662

The Conspiracy of the Batavians under Claudius Civilis” - Rembrandt - 1661/1662

What a game!

21/03/21

horn-detail.jpg

Should the bull’s head go black? - went a little too far with it today but it’s fixable.

25/03/21

Scaling sketches down in scanner is probably a good move. A few good drawings of old family photos tonight.

26/03/21

T.I.O.C.” looks more like an etching at the minute.

Loose! Emphasis on LOOSE!

27/03/21

Last night was a total nightmare. Floating, panic and chased by a hooded killer. Once caught a falling sensation would wake me up but once I dozed of I was straight back into the nightmare and repeated this process around four or five times.

‘Create and curate your own archive’.

Farewell Fernand.

28/03/21

Marta Dyezkowska Talk

memory / identity / trauma

We should be able to close the door on loss.

Standing with back to camera, an act of defiance against process. Mix memory with current state.

secondcollectivebelfast.com

Really enjoyed this talk today! Watching and listening in made me really nostalgic about LOFT. We should be proud of what we were able to achieve with that space.

29/03/21

The infamy of Crete” - finished. Not perfect but pretty solid.

30/03/21

Little bit of “T.I.O.C.” was really bugging me so I crept into the studio and fixed it last night.

studio-shot-30-03-21.jpg

Today was a case of drawing up a few smaller works and putting down basic paint layers. A promising start.

31/03/21

A quick up and down trip to Belfast for an appointment.

RDH: NOVEMBER 2020

01/11/20

Focus required…

…reaching it back to integrity of practice.

Large scale drawings?

02/11/20

Eventual studio time - detail of “Misunderstood” in progress

Eventual studio time - detail of “Misunderstood” in progress

03/11/20

Great to get imagery into some semblance of order.

“Thinking through making.” - Joy Gerrard during interview with GTG. Watch here.

Some good sketchbook work tonight.

Some good sketchbook work tonight.

06/11/20

“Misunderstood” finished.

Misunderstood” finished.

07/11/20

Reusing one canvas and starting another.

Reusing one canvas and starting another.

08/11/20

…settling back into a new routine… still healing.

10/11/20

11/11/20

IMMA Talk: From the Rego Studio.

13/11/20

Limbo-Land yet again.

14/11/20

Finding it difficult to concentrate with all going on. Just wish that aspects were sorted so that some kind of routine could be adhered to.

Some results but not all.

Detail of “Norwegian Nude” - work in progress.

Detail of “Norwegian Nude” - work in progress.

…giving up the ghost on the little ‘go cart’ piece. It just went stale but that’s OK. It wasn’t the right time.

16/11/20

Some sketchbook work tonight.

Some sketchbook work tonight.

19/11/20

Absolutely baltic in the studio.

Studio Shot:  19/11/20

Studio Shot: 19/11/20

20/11/20

Mostly focused on “Norwegian Nude” today but building up layers on other pieces too.

Left to Right:  “Troublesome” - “Shock” - “Norwegian Nude”

Left to Right: “Troublesome” - “Shock” - “Norwegian Nude

22/11/20

Detail of hand in “Norwegian Nude” in progress.

Detail of hand in “Norwegian Nude” in progress.

Really good progress today.

23/11/20

BP 158/113

26/11/20

Site update

27/11/20

Really great online talk from the Garter Lane Arts Centre: Chloe Austin in conversation with Matt Higgs, Kitsch Doom, and Ciara O Neill.

Did a few quick sketch of the speakers as they discussed their practices.

29/11/20

…readjust, centre, breathe and focus on what matters.

30/11/20

troublesome-30-11-20.jpg

After having a long, hard look at “Troublesome” - came to the realisation that figure is complete. Nice to leave it loose in parts. It explains what it needs to without having to divulge anything else.

Bit of building work in the background and it’s finished.

Decorations are up and a little winter halo to round off a very odd month.

winter-halo.jpg

RDH: SEPTEMBER 2020

01/09/20

Power is out.

02/09/20

The Rashomon Effect: When the same event is described in significantly different and often contradictory ways by people who were involved.

03/09/20

I do feel a little stuck with the Crimean Painting. Some sketchbook work - get back to the drawing board.

06/09/20

Death Masks: bottling the soul, bottling the trauma.

08/09/20

Very strange few days. ‘Taking Orders’ painting - just not sure where to go with it. Leaving it aside for now and having a look at adding a recent sketch and incorporating it into an old abandoned piece. The only good thing I can see in the failed ‘St. Lurach’s’ work is that weeping willow to the left. It should stay in some capacity.

Very lethargic for some reason.

Thoughts = NOT A REALIST PAINTER!!!

Lifelike/ reality isn’t what I’m aiming for in drawing or painting. Yes, sometimes a more realistic application or approach is required depending on what the image dictates. EG: ‘GO’K’ works in that it hints at realism but ultimately leaves the majority of the portrait minimal - barely any detail. This is not just limited to composition, but especially colour I think.

10/09/20

Belfast bound.

So good to get to the MAC for the degree shows from the Belfast School of Art.

‘Confessional’ reopening was great! It’s a show I’m very proud of.

12/09/20

tvh-detail.jpg

Some good progress on ‘The Voyage Home’. Less is more - even on this scale I think. Suits the image and composition well.

13/09/20

Finished!

tvh-detail-two.jpg

15/09/20

Halfway through September! HOW?!?!

Figuring out ideas for next steps and possibilities. Good to get some sketching done tonight. Forgot how accessible sketching smaller than A4 is.

sketchbook-work-15-09-20

18/09/20

‘The Week in Art’ podcast.

Guston and de Kooning - both developed making works with a ‘formula’ able to commercialise work / work that could be made in their sleep and sell no problem. Both rejected this formula and started again.

Integrity.

Elizabeth’ and ‘Mary Ann’ studies - the looser the better.

studio-shot-18-09-20

20/09/20

Detail of ‘Elizabeth Study’ - work in progress

Detail of ‘Elizabeth Study’ - work in progress

I think I’m coming close to a mini burn out as far as studio work is concerned. Might be good to take a step back, read and research for a few days and see where we are.

22/09/20

Finished the little portrait studies. Really different approach but that’s no bad thing. Started some new canvases.

“Art is a wound turned into light.”

Georges Braque

‘Elizabeth Study’ and ‘Mary Ann Study’

Elizabeth Study’ and ‘Mary Ann Study

23/09/20

Research - that’s about it.

24/09/20

Some good progress in the studio today.

studio-shot-24-09-20

25/09/20

Got scared very easily.

sketchbook-work-25/09/20

Sketchbook work.

26/09/20

Five canvases on the go at the minute. Best to focus on one or two at a time. First up., ‘Waiting Room’. It’s been a while from I attempted this image.

Seats / Symbols?

‘The Waiting Room’ - detail

The Waiting Room’ - detail

27/09/20

What was light at the end of the tunnel has turned into a dark abyss. Shrug it off and keep going.

28/09/20

Sketching

29/09/20

So the past few days have seen a real drop in productivity and drive. Reasons or not —> focusing on work will help. Taking a mini break will also help. Easy to fall into old, procrastinating habits.

Meaty questions.

30/09/20

Studio all clean and tidy!

studio-shot-30/09/20

RDH: AUGUST 2020

01/08/20

chris-ledger-ida-2018.jpg

So saddened to hear of the passing of Chris Ledger. She was a true friend of the arts in NI and helped me in both a professional and personal capacity. Her tenacity and drive will be sorely missed.

02/08/20

Cleaning and priming.

Cleaning and priming.

03/08/20

Seashore Jester’ … over-painted to the point of no return - burnt and slashed. Good progress on “Enfield Study” though.

Close up of “Enfield Study”.

Close up of “Enfield Study”.

It’s finally happened! I’ve had a little painting accepted into this year’s RUA exhibition!

04/08/20

Wee day off.

05/08/20

“Enfield Study” finished.

Enfield Study” finished.

Watched ‘Apocalypse Now’ properly for the first time. The real animal sacrifice at the end was disturbing.

06/08/20

Sketched out some new canvases including a narrow set for a triptych.

studio-show-06-08-20.jpg

Object connected to the figure rather than the figure itself so may need to rethink the centre canvas.

…a few people have told me how “Enfield Study” disturbs them and makes them feel uncomfortable. So a job well done.

07/08/20

Lots of blocking in compositions today.

Lots of blocking in compositions today.

10/08/20

Greenberg vs Read (HANDBAGS!)

exhibit-a-detail-in-progress.jpg

Some studio time today. Almost too warm.

12/08/20

Left up “Hotel ‘78” to the RUA today.

kitcar-circa-1994ish.jpg

Sketchbook work.

14/08/20

Jenny Saville in the “A Brush With” podcast is great!

When asked what is art for, Saville replies:

“Art is for life. Art is for survival. You know it’s a shock of recognition that you feel a sense of belonging you recognise yourself in the world. I really believe it’s for survival. It’s intrinsic to being human. We either have to make marks or it’s like singing or making music. It’s fundamental to being a human being. I can’t imagine doing anything else. When I’m in the process of painting I feel very in touch with myself in a sense that nothing else I’ve ever done in my life does.”

Satellite paths

Satellite paths

16/08/20

Nothing the past few days due to another trip to the hospital.

18/08/20

One year to go.

19/08/20

finished-exhibits-a-to-c.jpg

Finished “Exhibits A to C”. Good to get painting again after a little setback. Chuffed to be names Catalyst Art’s Member of the Month for August!

20/08/20

Some good studio time in today.

21/08/20

“A painting which is from a specific photograph - you have to go beyond the photograph so you have to make the paint do something and once it gets a nature of itself then it belongs to the world and it takes a long time to get be in that field.”

Jenny Saville (link for interview here)

23/08/20

“Avarice is the enemy of virtue.”

Leon Battista Alberti

sketchbook-work-23-08-20.jpg

Sketching and mostly failing.

25/08/20

Studio time but nothing too strenuous.

Great to have a virtual catch up with UoA folk!

29/08/20

Trauma is inarticulate.

Some good progress on “But I Don’t Get It”. Still flat in areas but it’s nearly there.

Some good progress on “But I Don’t Get It”. Still flat in areas but it’s nearly there.

31/08/20

Finished “B.I.D.G.I.”

Finished “B.I.D.G.I.”

RDH: MAY 2020

01/05/20

Finding a new normal.

02/05/20

…so not just images / maps / diagrams but also fears: nightmares.

  • Where are you?

  • What’s your date of birth?

  • What’s today’s date?

  • Do you know why you are here?

  • Who is the Prime minister?

  • Lift both arms

  • Push against me.

  • Follow my finger.

  • Any dizziness? Nausea?

A face in the clouds.

A face in the clouds.

…cover the eyes.

05/05/20

VAI’s café: So good to see what Cecilia Danell is up to in lockdown.

06/05/20

Tried drawing. Didn’t go well. It’s going to take longer than first thought to get back to creative work. Super frustrating.

11/05/20

Head is so sore today. Silver lining: Jerry Saltz’s “How to Be an Artist” arrived today.

12/05/20

  • …avoid little voice neigh-saying in your head. All topics are valid.

  • utilise R.D. more.

  • …with found imagery, find and explore that connection to your own experiences.

  • You never stop learning or looking for new ways to work.

  • Sharpen observational skills. Draw from experience.

Over-analysing? Maybe.

BBC4 LIFE DRAWING LIVE

“A work of art cannot depend on explanation” - Jerry Saltz

14/05/20

Really enjoyed the webinar from VAI with CCA’s Catherine Hemelryk

INTEGRITY!

16/05/20

National Drawing Day. Really good to sit down and just draw today. Did a live-stream where I set up a still life and a few people drew along.

17/05/20

John Berger is always a good read.

18/05/20

Sketchbook work

19/05/20

VAI café

Orla Whelan: existential questions - preoccupation with death. Philosophical exploration.

Another little bit of late night sketching.

22/05/20

The virtual opening of the Catalyst Members Show.

More late night sketchbook work.

24/05/20

“An artists’ job is to reflect the time we live in.” - Nina Simone

26/05/20

“Using line to make visual texture” - Fiona Rae on Dürer

“Race to the Bottom” detail.

“Race to the Bottom” detail.

27/05/20

studio-shot-27-05-20.jpg

28/05/20

Started teaching my dad how to stretch canvas as I can’t at the moment.

Apparently I have the same birthday as Edward Hopper.

30/05/20

Canvas projecting.

Canvas projecting.

31/05/20

Early morning reading.

Early morning reading.

“At root, truth to painting is truth to light.” - Juliam Barnes

mr-crow.jpg

RDH: OCTOBER 2019

01/10/19

“A puncture - a level of emotion” - Zarina Bhimji

Mental health does not and should not define who we are.

Work is dropped off to Newtownards!

Work is dropped off to Newtownards!

03/10/19

Umbrella destroyed by storm but the opening of “Bardo” was great. Great support from friends and a wonderful text written by Gemma Murphy.

bardo-opening.jpg

09/10/19

“Sress is the killer of creativity” - Jamian Juliano Villani

Good sketchbook session tonight.

Good sketchbook session tonight.

11/10/19

Doodles to burn.

12/10/19

Cooley’ is gone. Very stale so had to go. A really old image of Helen has replaced it. It’s been a long time since I attempted this image.

studio-shot-12-10-19.jpg

Mask and orchard idea. Sucker for attempting old failures.

17/10/19

Placed…

The prodigal ipod returns after nearly a year missing.

The prodigal ipod returns after nearly a year missing.

19/10/19

Study of Helen” - image is nine years old and I’ve tried to tackle it many many times but only now does it feel like I am making any sort of headway. Difficult to describe. “No Regrets” - push and pull between the two images.

studio-shot-19-10-19.jpg

20/10/19

Conscious decision to limit the palette initially. Sometimes there can be too much choice - especially when starting a new piece. Thinking that by limiting colour in the first stages it can help focus in on tonal values and composition a little more.

“No Regrets” - Painting in progress

No Regrets” - Painting in progress

Weekends aren’t long enough.

24/10/19

Couple kissing under a dark sky.

Geometric lines turn from canvas folds to forks of lightning.

Portrait with slightly opened lips.

26/10/19

Very impressed with the RUA show this year. Some really strong works. Also great to check out the Ulster Museum’s new acquisition of Cornelia Parker.

‘On Refusal’ in the MAC is brilliant - especially Troy Michie’s stunning collages.

David Sherry’s ‘Philosophical Society’ in the Golden Thread Gallery was a lot of fun!

David Sherry’s ‘Philosophical Society’ in the Golden Thread Gallery was a lot of fun!

Some unexpected speed curating from VAI was good fun and great to meet up with old friends.

27/10/19

Little visit to Fiona Stewart’s fabulous studio to be recorded for an upcoming podcast.

30/10/19

Applications.

RDH: 01/12/18 - 31/12/18

01/12/18

bereft-clown-work-in-progressJPG

Blocked out “Bereft Clown”.

02/12/18

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Found an ogham poster on North Street with an interesting translation.

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Vault studios is amazing - especially EMIC’s studio space!

04/12/18

…text to coincide with next solo show…

08/12/18

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Studio work today. Thought I was close to finishing ‘confessional’ but it might be further away than I imagined.

09/12/18

“You make a mistake when you explain the paintings through the war.”

Mark Stevens - on Bacon’s “Three Studies for Figures at the Base of a Crucifixion”

Several shooting stars.

15/12/18

Probably the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do. Childhood hero reduced. It's a real jolt to the system.

Trauma doesn’t discriminate. It’s so subjective that it can defy explanation or description. Nightmarish.

16/12/18

Materials courtesy of the University of Atypical’s iDA award arrived to the studio today.

Materials courtesy of the University of Atypical’s iDA award arrived to the studio today.

Need to learn to keep some things to yourself.

See it through. Stay strong and keep head up.

17/12/18

Panic attack today.

21/12/18

You never fully appreciate someone until its too late. A true legend that has shaped so many. Time with family is so important.

Resolutions < Revolutions

22/12/18

Moon-rise over Glenshane.

Moon-rise over Glenshane.

Thought I had a good night’s sleep but my body is telling me different. Need to draw more again.

26/12/18

Getting lost in thought about art is a joy. It’s like taking a mini vacation.

27/12/18

found-image-sketch.JPG

Some sketchbook work. Not much but it’s a start.

Look more before putting pen to paper. This is not to say to lose the immediacy during the act of drawing but to take a breath to absorb and examine what an image has to offer.

29/12/18

Finished “Confessional”. Maybe when the mind is distracted slightly it makes studio work more of an automated response? Decisions were made and action was taken.

confessional-finished

Not saying having a completely distracted head-space works. Far from it. I’ve been there plenty of times and it’s disastrous. No. It’s more a case of - you’re in the studio and you have a clear(ish) idea of where the work will go so you follow that. The decision making dilemma is lessened due to the preoccupation of other matters going on upstairs.

30/12/18

A bit of work done to “Bereft Clown before clearing the palette and studio up for another year.

bereft-clown-in-progress.JPG

RDH: 01/07/18 - 31/07/18

01/07/18

Crunching numbers.

02/07/18

... feels unfinished ... sections fall apart ... a denying of illusionism ...

"The Mountain of the Heights" in progress.

"The Mountain of the Heights" in progress.

03/07/18

TRAUMA PARADOX - CONCEPT

04/07/18

Shocked. Head spirals backwards.  Sketchbook work today.

05/07/18

'Bardo' - (tibetan) a state between life and death

...instead of saying "What's wrong with you?" it should be "What happened to you?"

relaxing with visual artists news sheet from VAI

relaxing with visual artists news sheet from VAI

1:  Emotional brain basically becomes a 'survival brain' and can hijack the conscious brain.

2:  Alarm system in brain becomes distorted and a person may become hyper vigilant.

3:  Ability to appraise the present and to learn from experience (an imbalance and a resistance to heal).

Developmental trauma takes time to heal and there are no quick fixes.

BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH!!!!

07/07/18

Lifting works from the Townhouse Gallery in Belfast.

Lifting works from the Townhouse Gallery in Belfast.

rough sketch for an installation idea

rough sketch for an installation idea

08/07/18

A research day.

A research day.

09/07/18

Studio wall

Studio wall

Refined some charcoal marks on the large landscape today.

10/07/18

"Traumatic Memory"

trauma - from the greek meaning 'to wound' or 'to pierce'.

11/07/18

NOTES from Psychology texts:

"...the story of trauma is one of enlightenment and forgetfulness.Knowledge gained and lost over and over. A history categorised by criticism and denial."

A tragic paradox of trauma is that one of it's primary casualties is that of truth itself.

Trauma is considered as - "an event outside the range of usual experience." (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders -III - R - 1980)

Trauma shatters the assumptive world - invincibility has gone and the world is seen as darker, chaotic, evil and dangerous.

12/07/18

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Sketchbook work today.  Little steps are better than no steps at all.

13/07/18

Canvas nearly ready to go in the studio

Canvas nearly ready to go in the studio

Stretched a few canvases today.

14/07/18

detail of landscape in progress

detail of landscape in progress

Colours laid out and tightened back of landscape canvas.

15/07/18

;

16/07/18

"The Mountain of the Heights" in the garden.

"The Mountain of the Heights" in the garden.

Finished "The Mountain of the Heights" today.  Could have done more but I'm learning to let go before work is destroyed.

17/07/18

"Second hand images can create first hand emotion" - Marlene Dumas

18/07/18

A delivery of paints came today

A delivery of paints came today

19/07/18

"Lost Illusions" by Balzac

20/07/18

A pretty good start to my week off; I have been offered a solo show!

21/07/18

Justine McDonnell's "A Composition of She" in the Golden Thread Gallery, Belfast

Justine McDonnell's "A Composition of She" in the Golden Thread Gallery, Belfast

First night out in Belfast in ages and we are evacuated from Laverys due to a 'fire'.

First night out in Belfast in ages and we are evacuated from Laverys due to a 'fire'.

22/07/18

Stunning paintings by Elizabeth Magill at the Ulster Museum, Belfast

Stunning paintings by Elizabeth Magill at the Ulster Museum, Belfast

23/07/18

An idea for using flattened paint boxes.

An idea for using flattened paint boxes.

Too many ideas floating around.

NB:  To loosen up before working from chosen imagery, I want to try and do some work from life beforehand.  Can't do any harm.

A five minute self portrait study

A five minute self portrait study

24/07/18

"The Landis Museum" exhibition at the CCA, Derry

"The Landis Museum" exhibition at the CCA, Derry

A trip to Derry for meetings and gallery visits.

Detail of one of Colin Davidson's remarkable paintings in "Silent Testimony" at the Nerve Visual Gallery, Derry

Detail of one of Colin Davidson's remarkable paintings in "Silent Testimony" at the Nerve Visual Gallery, Derry

I first saw Colin Davidson's 'Silent Testimony' three years ago in the Ulster Museum. Today it was in the Nerve Visual Gallery in Derry.  Still so powerful.  The 'us and them' mentality is nonexistent and removing divisive language and politics reveals the human suffering on all sides.  It is so important.  So glad to have seen it again.

Beginnings of a small canvas experiment

Beginnings of a small canvas experiment

Merging two old drawing works onto a new canvas.

Merging two old drawing works onto a new canvas.

Have multiple little eggs going on at the moment.

Imagine... Rose Wylie on BBC iPlayer

...where presence is evident...

"I think you're a lot happier if you don't mind a bit of imperfection." - Rose Wyllie

25/07/18

The two sons of Oedipus, Polynices and Eteocles translates to "Manifold Strife" and "Truly Glorious" respectively.  Might just be the title of a new painting that's been started.

Good news: I have two works pre-selected for the Royal Ulster Academy 2018.  Fingers crossed!

26/07/18

"What's for you won't go past you."

Progress on a small painting study

Progress on a small painting study

TAL R on Louisiana Channel

"It's strange, but you can't make a painting without content. Content is not like solving a problem in school or university. Content much more means that you've built up enough reason to do it. And content is also shitty because if you begin to identify too much with the content then you can't move. There are too many people shouting out in the chorus. Content starts you up and you leave it behind. It doesn't mean that you remove yourself from the content but it's too cumbersome to carry along. So when I'm working, it's not mechanical at all but it's cool headed because I'm not questioning the content. I've left it behind. It's interesting to say that content is crap, but you can't live without it." - TAL R

27/07/18

Four works in progress in the studio

Four works in progress in the studio

"A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" - painting in progress

"A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" - painting in progress

Really pleased with how "A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" is shaping up.

candle.JPG

"You have to create something that lives in a kind of mystery." - TAL R

28/07/18

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Worked on "Rehearsal Study" today.  Played with skin tone and facial features using an air compressor to manipulate the paint. A slightly less controlled appearance.

31/07/18

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So pleased to have been able to attend the iDA reception event at the Atypical Gallery in Belfast.  This website is only possible through the iDA grant from atypical and the Arts Council fo Northern Ireland so I'm extremely grateful for their continued support and guidance.  Congratulations to all the award recipients this year!

Whoever heard of a Black Artist?" on BBC iPlayer.

RDH: 27/05/18 - 30/06/18

27/25/18

Munk Debates

NB:- "Imprint": washes over selected charcoal marks makes for a more painterly and softer outcome whilst still retaining the drawing element - it's just not as overwhelming.  Marrying the two worlds.  Artistically I'm in a good place.  It's utilising time more effectively.

28/05/18

On Hodler's "Night":  covered figure personifies death as an intensification of sleep.  On the back of the canvas Hodler wrote: "There is many a people who lies down to rest in the evening but who does not wake up in the morning."

"Night" by Ferdinand Hodler - 1899/90 - Museum of Fine Arts Bern

"Night" by Ferdinand Hodler - 1899/90 - Museum of Fine Arts Bern

"Riot" and "Chidren of the Stage" started.

"Children of the Stage" - early progress.

"Children of the Stage" - early progress.

Haven't painted on board in two years.  Keep forgetting how forgiving the surface is.

"Riot" piece started.

"Riot" piece started.

29/05/18

Hot air balloon in trouble over Draperstown medical centre.

Hot air balloon in trouble over Draperstown medical centre.

Started small canvas of "Cult" drawing I did five years ago.  Been a long time but its always good to keep everything - just in case.

"Cult" painting in progress.

"Cult" painting in progress.

30/05/18

Let's see what happens.

02/06/18

Playing about with "The Mountain of the Heights" - particularly the sky.  Intangible so the marks should be also.

Early layers of sky

Early layers of sky

03/06/18

"Rosetta II" by Jenny Saville - oil on watercolour paper mounted on board - 2005/06

"Rosetta II" by Jenny Saville - oil on watercolour paper mounted on board - 2005/06

"I want to be a painter of modern life, and modern bodies." - Jenny Saville.

A.F. born today.

More progress in the sky of "The Mountain of the Heights".

More progress in the sky of "The Mountain of the Heights".

04/06/18

"The Mountain of the Heights" and "Imprint" on the studio wall.

"The Mountain of the Heights" and "Imprint" on the studio wall.

05/06/18

Notes from a previous workshop:

  • Turn off distractions

  • Centred space

  • Give yourself permission to move your practice forward.

  • Elevator pitch - needs work.

  • Find focus and priorities.

  • Studio days - regimented routine.

  • Be persistent and consistent.

  • Find unproductive habits + break them.

  • Defend creative time.

  • Slow down and hear your own ideas.

"Creativity is not a talent - it's a way of operating." - John Cleese

When you value serendipity, you start noticing it at work right away.

07/06/18

Awarded iDA from Atypical Gallery and the Arts Council of Northern Ireland!

09/06/18

Degree show work entitled "My Darlene" by photographer Ryan Hamilton.

Degree show work entitled "My Darlene" by photographer Ryan Hamilton.

Installation shot from Stephanie Tanney's degree show. Not unlike Holder's shrouded figure.

Installation shot from Stephanie Tanney's degree show. Not unlike Holder's shrouded figure.

A close up of one of Karl Hagan's stunning paintings at the Belfast School of Art degree show.

A close up of one of Karl Hagan's stunning paintings at the Belfast School of Art degree show.

One of Aimee Melaugh's atmospheric paintings at her degree show.

One of Aimee Melaugh's atmospheric paintings at her degree show.

Saw a lot of art.  A LOT OF ART.

Belfast School of Art degree show was fantastic but there were four stand out artists:

Ryan Hamilton in photography.

Stephanie Tanney in sculpture.

Karl Hagan in painting

Aimee Melaugh in painting.

The Golden Thread Gallery group exhibition "After an Act" was great.

"Submerge Form (Red)" by Deb Covell - 2017

"Submerge Form (Red)" by Deb Covell - 2017

David Moore's show in Belfast Exposed was really interesting.

The back wall of David Moore's exhibition entitled "Lisa and John" in Belfast Exposed.

The back wall of David Moore's exhibition entitled "Lisa and John" in Belfast Exposed.

10/06/18

Whiterocks beach just outside Portrush.

Whiterocks beach just outside Portrush.

11/06/18

Zero energy.  There are not enough hours in the day.  Structure.  Guilty of putting off work because of convenience.

Some sketchbook work done today but not enough.

Some sketchbook work done today but not enough.

13/06/18

Is yellow is the colour of hope?

"Selvportrett I Helvvette" by Edvard Munch - 1903 - The Munch Museum, Oslo

"Selvportrett I Helvvette" by Edvard Munch - 1903 - The Munch Museum, Oslo

16/06/18

"Painting 1946" by Francis Bacon. Part of the MoMA collection.

"Painting 1946" by Francis Bacon. Part of the MoMA collection.

Bacon was fascinated by butcher shops as a child.  The figure in the painting said to be pre-war Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain - known for carrying an umbrella.  This work is raw power, beauty and horror rolled in one.

My painter's table of 8 years.

My painter's table of 8 years.

18/06/18

Detail of "Cult" painting in progress.

Detail of "Cult" painting in progress.

Paint/draw with purpose.  Reasons - just because I can't pin them down doesn't mean they aren't there.

20/06/18

Lubaina Himid - take a "given history" from found objects and then "paint a history on them that isn;t as much talked about."  Daytime can't be squandered - every hour counts.

23/06/18

Bonnie keeping me company in the studio today.

Bonnie keeping me company in the studio today.

Painted pretty much up to 10pm tonight,.  Stuck in the zone.

24/06/18

Jan enjoying the sunset at Rosses Point, Sligo.

Jan enjoying the sunset at Rosses Point, Sligo.

Trip to Rosses Point.  So hot too and great to bump into Rob and Sally.  Small world.

25/06/18

View of "An Irish Airman Foresees His Death" in the Hamilton Gallery, Sligo.

View of "An Irish Airman Foresees His Death" in the Hamilton Gallery, Sligo.

Great to see familiar names (Lisa Ballard, Alison Pilkington and Clement McAleer) in the Hamilton Gallery's group exhibition 'An Irish Airman Foresees His Death'.

One of my favourite pieces in the Hamilton Gallery had to be "Spirit of the Aviator" by Brian McDonagh.

One of my favourite pieces in the Hamilton Gallery had to be "Spirit of the Aviator" by Brian McDonagh.

26/06/18

Trip to The Model in Sligo town before home.  A wonderful space.

Outside The Model, Sligo.

Outside The Model, Sligo.

Massive painting by Antje Majewski in the "Future Perfect" exhibition, The Model, Sligo

Massive painting by Antje Majewski in the "Future Perfect" exhibition, The Model, Sligo

28/06/18

Close up of "Cult" - Oil and Charcoal on Canvas

Close up of "Cult" - Oil and Charcoal on Canvas

Slowly getting back into the rhythm of working again.  Finished "Cult".  The small child is considerably creepier than expected.  More work to "Mountain of the Heights" - been looking at Cezanne's multiple treatments of Mont Sainte-Victoire for some sort of guidance.

Getting there with "The Mountain of the Heights".

Getting there with "The Mountain of the Heights".

Extremely hot in the studio - close to 30°C.

30/06/18

I have Sickert's "Ennui" on my mind. 

"Ennui" by Walter Richard Sickert - 1914 - part of Tate Collection

"Ennui" by Walter Richard Sickert - 1914 - part of Tate Collection